Citizens: We have a very important announcement to make (read to the end).
Due to unforeseen circumstances we will not be able host The Voyage this year. We wish we wouldn’t have to make this announcement, but at this point it is out of our hands.
What does this mean? Well, remember, this is Dada Land and we don’t allow any grumpiness so here’s what’s going to happen.
Firstly, we are going to take the opportunity to plan an even bigger and better Voyage for everyone in 2017 so send us your ideas!!
Secondly, we hate not playing shows so we’re going to announce something very special next Tuesday morning at 10am PT… so set your alarms!
– Stefan and Olle
To Whom It May Concern:
We want to bring your attention to a most pressing issue. Whilst your brand has been established for many years and commands a great deal of respect and prestige in the champagne industry we feel we represent a growing number of consumers who are not being catered to by your company.
We have had tried many of your champagnes over the years, more than most probably, but we are increasingly disappointed with the performance of your product.
For a high end, premium champagne we expect a much better product. Upon opening the most recent bottle of Moët & Chandon the effervescence seemed appropriate, but upon further inspection we noted it fell short. It literally fell short.
You see, at most of the shows we play there is a minimum of 10’ between the stage and the crowd. We hoped your champagne would have enough power to cover this distance, it didn’t. As everyone knows, how far you can spray a bottle of champagne is a key marker of a fine product. We feel you are falsely advertising a premium product when it clearly is not. We have tried many things, Stefan had to master the double handed thumb spray (a move he invested – and it’s not easy) to counteract the weakness of your product. But enough is enough. You must understand there are customers who pay a premium for your champagne and expect a premium spraying experience.
We are open to consulting with you in the hopes that you can make a better champagne more suited to us and the growing market segment we represent.
– Dada Land Department of Consumer Affairs
This is Red Rocks in Colorado – it has to be one of the most beautiful venues in the world! Humans of all kinds have been gathering here for hundreds of years, listening to and performing music and rituals.
We’ve played here before but never for our own headline show, and this Saturday night we have that privilege. Sometimes it’s good to take a moment and think about how far you’ve come and for us this weekend is one of those moments.
To all the Citizens that have supported us along the way – we love you, truly.
As our way of saying thank you we want to give something back in true Dada Life fashion and that’s what this weekend is.
We’ve spent months planning what has become the biggest stage show we’ve ever done. We don’t want to spoil the surprises but think The Voyage meets a Compound show with a twist of the Magnificent Rave Spa…. At Jurassic Park… On acid.
To those coming this weekend, get ready to get uglier than ever before in your life.
To those you can’t make it, thank you for being part of our dysfunctional banana family where freaks have more fun and remember, always Do the Dada!
To Whom It May Concern,
We recently became aware of your organization and we wanted to commence cordial relationships between our two respective
entities. We think what you are doing is of utmost importance, not only to our great nation of Dada Land, but also other nations.
We want to bring as much awareness to your organization as possible. We noticed you have many banana artifacts but we felt something special was missing. To this end we have shipped one of our famous “Big Bananas” to you. Our biggest to date is 9 meters long (please see image attached) but we have created a custom one for you specially which measures 25 meters long. This gesture, we hope, will bring good relations in the future.
The package is scheduled to be delivered to you by May 1 2016 via Fedex.
Please respond by April 15th if you foresee any issues receiving this gift.
To Whom It May Concern:
It has come to our attention that you are currently selling the Haile Sand Fort, an abandoned sea fort off the coast of England.
It is most fortuitous that we came across your listing as we have been searching for something very specific, and we believe this property might be it. That said, we have some questions that we would appreciate your response to. Firstly, we intent to install a commercial scale sound system on the Sea Fort. What kind of electricity does it run on? Secondly, as you may be aware Stefan has to have a daily feeding of candy, so how far is it from the coast via a fast speed boat? Finally, how quickly will our micronation be formally recognized by the United Nations, is that something you can help us with?
For rather a longtime we have been looking for a location to set up our own nation, away from the serious rules of the rest of the world and one where, amongst other things, Happy Violence is legal. Having withstood aircraft and submarine attacks during both WWI and WWII, the sea fort represents the strength and resolve of our great nation.
In this property, we believe we have found our nirvana, our Dada Land!
We look forward to your prompt reply.
The Presidents of Dada Land